


I realized I need you here, as desperate as that sounds

by queentheea



Series: My Bingo Card [1]
Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Bellarke Bingo, Exes, F/M, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Police Officer Bellamy Blake, Recreational Drug Use, Single Parent Clarke Griffin, also very brief, but like super mild, this is the first real oneshot I've written in 5 ever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-03 20:44:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20459201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queentheea/pseuds/queentheea
Summary: Bellamy is called to the scene of a car accident where he is shocked to find that one of the people involved is his ex-girlfriend, Clarke. Who he hasn’t seen in six years.Written for Bellarke BingoTropes used: Exes, Single mom Clarke.





	I realized I need you here, as desperate as that sounds

**Author's Note:**

> WOW I haven't posted anything here in forever. This piece was written for Bellarke bingo, which inspired me to write fic again. I would also like to point out that I don't pretend to know anything about how the American justice system works so anything cop-related used in this fic was likely pulled from Brooklyn Nine-Nine or Googled briefly. Trying to decide if I should add more parts and expand this universe a bit. Thoughts?
> 
> Title from Woke the F*ck Up by Jon Bellion.

“All units, we have a crash on Ark and Tondc. Is anyone close?”

Bellamy looks over at his partner in the driver’s seat and reaches for the radio. “This is Blake, we’re close.” 

It has been a rather slow shift. He and Miller are just about off the clock. This should be their last call of the day. 

As Miller pulls onto Ark Street to block the intersection Bellamy takes in the accident. It isn’t anything too serious, just a fender-bender. It definitely could have been worse than a rear-ender. One vehicle is a larger pickup truck, and the other is a smaller car. The car’s back bumper is completely crushed inward. The truck looks relatively unscathed. Bellamy doubts anyone got seriously injured.

Bellamy hops out of the car to look for the owners of the vehicles while Miller goes to talk to witnesses. Over their two and a half years as partners on the force they have developed a steady routine. 

“Stupid bitch! You slammed on your breaks out of nowhere,” Bellamy hears from his left as a car door slams closed. A man has just gotten out of the truck and is stocking towards a blonde woman and a child. She had her back turned to Bellamy. 

“You need to watch your language in front of my daughter,” the woman fires back. Bellamy only hesitates momentarily at the sound of the familiar voice. It’s Clarke. Clarke had a daughter. Her hair was shorter and she was more built than he remembers, but that voice was undeniably Clarke’s voice.

Bellamy looked helplessly towards Miller, hoping they could swap, but he is blissfully unaware of Bellamy’s gaze, and in the middle of interviewing witnesses. As badly as Bellamy wants to shrink away and hide for another six years, he had a job to do. 

“Sir, I’m going to need you to calm down,” Bellamy says. His gaze flickered to Clarke briefly, who’s surprise shows for about a millisecond before it is replaced with a mask of anger. For a moment, Bellamy thinks that it is directed towards him. But she glares straight at the man in front of her while an arm is wrapped around her daughter protectively. 

“I’m the one that needs to calm down? This bitch is trying to commit insurance fraud! She slammed on her breaks in the middle of the road!” 

“It was a red light!” Clarke exclaims. The other man is fuming and Bellamy can smell the stench of alcohol on his breath as he steps closer to them. He feels a swell of anger that anyone would get into a vehicle like that. 

“Sir, I’m going to need you to come with me,” Bellamy says, stepping towards the man. Bellamy escorts the other driver away from Clarke as the paramedics arrive at the scene, and she leads her daughter towards them. “Miller, I’m going to need a breathalyser test over here,” Bellamy calls to his partner. 

Miller nods and steps away from the bystanders he had been interviewing. The other driver continues to spew protests as he is tested and confirmed to be over the legal limit. Miller cuffs him and puts him in the back of the squad car. Bellamy notices that tow trucks had arrived on the scene during the hassle. One of the truck drivers is getting ready to take Clarke’s car away. 

Clarke herself, sits on the bumper of the ambulance holding her daughter as she talks to one of the paramedics. For the most part, both seem to be unharmed. Miller notices his hesitation and raises an eyebrow. 

“That’s Clarke,” Bellamy explains with a jerk of his head in her direction.

“Shit. Like The Clarke?”

“The Clarke.”

Miller appears to be having an internal debate for a moment before turning to Bellamy with a sly smile. “Why don’t I take this guy back to the station. You can meet us there.”

“Miller I swear—” but Miller had already turned away to get into the car. Bellamy watches with a slack jaw as his partner turns on the car and drives away.

Bellamy just stands there for a moment, unsure what to do next. When he glances back at Clarke she is already looking at him. The paramedic must have deemed that they did not need to go to the hospital, because he is packing up in the back of his ambulance as Clarke and her daughter stand on the sidewalk off to the side. Bellamy draws in a deep breath before walking towards them. 

“Come on,” he says. “My car is parked at the station. I’ll give you a ride home.”

“You really don’t have to,” Clarke replies quickly. Her face Bellamy can’t read her expression.

“It’s only a few blocks from here. There’s some paperwork I need you to sign anyway.”

Clarke’s shoulders slump in defeat. Her daughter must have fallen asleep at some point, because the girl is clutched protectively in Clarke’s arms. She couldn’t have been more than four or five years old, Bellamy deduces. She had been bawling earlier, he isn’t surprised that she is sleeping this early in the evening. She must be exhausted. 

Clarke probably notices him staring, because her body visibly stiffens. “She’s adopted,” Clarke snaps. Bellamy raises his hands in defence. All of her walls are up. He doesn’t really blame her.

“The station’s this way,” he motions.

…

Looking back on it now, Bellamy realizes their relationship had been doomed from the start. They met in college, when they were both unstable and irresponsible. Bellamy had been hanging around with some bad people and getting into a lot of trouble in a grief-stricken rage after his mother had died. And Clarke had been a young, rebellious artist insistent on proving that she was everything her mother didn’t want her to be. 

They got together in the back of a dingy bar who’s owner didn’t bat an eye at her sloppy fake ID or care if he smoked up inside. For the first few months their relationship was a mixture of booze, weed, and the excitement of a new, fresh love. He was high on her. The nights that he would spend holding her on the patio of his shitty apartment while they passed a bottle of wine and a joint back and forth and just talked for hours were still some of his favourite memories. 

They bickered often, but it never came with a ton of malice. She’d get after him for leaving his clothes all over her dorm when her RA could walk in at any moment, and he’d tease her about her elitist upbringing, but at the end of the day Bellamy knew he had loved her deeply. 

They lasted for nine months until one night she came to him after a rather nasty fight with her mother and it all spiraled out of control. She’d walked through the door with her cheeks stained from tears and kissed him hard on the mouth. Bellamy had pulled away from her rather abruptly.

“What’s wrong,” he’d asked.

“Don’t worry about it. Just make me forget,” Clarke had whispered, before surging forward and burying her fingers in his hair and kissing him again. 

Something about the interaction had rubbed Bellamy the wrong way. He’d shoved her off of him and she’d stepped away and given him a confused look. Bellamy remembered feeling a surge of anger. 

“So is that all I am to you? A fucked up escapist fantasy from your fucked up family?”

“How dare you,” Clarke had seethed. 

“How dare I? What does this relationship even mean to you, Clarke? Am I just another tool you can use to get back at your mother? To prove you’ll never be the perfect little debutant that she wanted?”

“Are you accusing me of using you? Are you accusing me of faking my feelings for you for attention?” she had yelled back.

“Isn’t that what this is? A way to get back at your mother for ruining her marriage? ‘Town princess stoops to the level of street scum and ruins her immaculate reputation”

“You aren’t just a phase for me, Bellamy!”

“Well maybe you were for me!”

They had both stopped and stared at one another for a moment after that. Tears had pooled in her eyes but she hadn’t let them fall. Bellamy had wanted to take it back right then. He’d never meant it.

“I guess that’s it then,” Clarke had says coldly.

“I guess it is.”

She’d walked out the door that night and he hadn’t seen her since. One of their mutual friends had told him that she’d moved across state to live with her dad. He never called and Clarke didn’t either. After all the horrible things he’d said to her he didn’t blame her. Bellamy told himself that she deserved better. She deserved someone who wouldn’t blow up at her over his own insecurities. 

Time went on and Bellamy got his life together. A few years later he applied to the police academy, and miraculously with his history, got in. After graduation, he went straight home and got a spot on the force. He met Miller a day later, when they were assigned as partners. He rarely thought about Clarke. Passing by the diner that they used to frequent while he was on patrol became less and less painful. Clarke was just a memory of his past. Doing better by keeping kids like him off the streets was Bellamy’s future.

…

The walk to the police station is relatively silent. When they get there they don’t exchange many words either, other than for Bellamy to show Clarke where to sign. He takes a couple extra minutes to fill out his portion of the paperwork. Miller graciously volunteers to finish the arrest report. Bellamy grabs his keys and jacket and leads Clarke out to his car. 

She places her daughter in the back and secures her seatbelt before climbing into the passenger’s side. 

“Where are you living now,” Bellamy asks.

“Apartment complex across from Grounders,” she whispers back, citing the old coffee shop they used to frequent. Bellamy glances at her in surprise but Clarke keeps her eyes forward. Bellamy clears his throat awkwardly and turns the key in the ignition. 

There is really no reason for Bellamy to walk Clarke and her daughter up to their apartment, but he really can’t help himself. It’s been six damn years and he still feels drawn to her. 

Clarke shuffles her daughter to one arm before taking out her key to unlock the apartment. “Well,” she says, “thanks. I’ll see you I guess.” 

Everything in his body screams at him to leave it be and let the door close behind her, but against every instinct, Bellamy reaches out and grabs Clarke’s forearm.

“Clarke, wait. Can we talk?”

She hesitates for a moment and he regrets that he said anything. But then she cracks the door open a bit wider and he lets out a sigh of relief before following her into the apartment. 

“Just let me..” she trails off, motioning to the child in her arms.

“Yeah, yeah of course.” She disappears into the next room and Bellamy sits on her couch and begins to play with his hands. Clarke returns a moment later and cautiously sits on the other end of the couch, putting as much space between them as possible. 

“Her name is Madi,” Clarke says suddenly, and Bellamy lifts his chin to look at her. “She was my cousin’s. She and her husband died in a car crash a couple of years ago. Madi was in the car. I took her in as soon as she was allowed to leave the hospital. I wasn’t going to let them put her into the system.” Their eyes connect for a brief, meaningful moment before she turns again.

Bellamy is taken back by the confession. His sister spent the later years of her teenage life in the foster system. Clarke knows that. There’s so much that he wants to say to her. 

“I’m glad she has you” is all that comes out.

Clarke sighs. “Me too.”

“Look, that night we fought I says some terrible things to you. I let my own insecurities get to my head and I took it out on you. I’m sorry.”

Clarke lifts her knee to rest on the couch so that she can face him. “I forgive you,” she says.

“Clarke, you don’t have to do that. I said some awful things and —”

“But I do, Bellamy. Six years is a long time. I’ve had time to think about it.” 

In that moment he sees her carefully sculpted walls begin to come down again. She still doesn't trust him, which is unsurprising and understandable, but she’s taken one brick off the top and that’s all that matters for now. Maybe he can finally have Clarke back in his life. 

“I also realized that in part, you were right,” she continues. I was trying to escape where I came from. I didn’t want to be associated with my mom or anything she represented. You were everything she wouldn’t have chosen for me—but that wasn’t the only reason I wanted you. We fit, you know? We had fun, and you got me, and I didn’t ever feel like I needed to pretend to be something I wasn’t. And sure, we were young, and we did some stupid shit, but that stuff doesn’t taint what you were to me.” 

Carefully, Bellamy rests his hand on hers on top of the couch. “You were never a phase for me Clarke. I should never have said that.” The corner of her lips quirk up, slightly. 

“It’s getting late. I need to be at work early tomorrow,” he tries to keep the disappointment off his face at that, and removes his hand from hers.

“Okay, I’ll get out of your hair.” 

Clarke walks him to the door. He opens the door and offers her a quick goodnight. He turns to leave but Clarke calls after him. “Do you want to get coffee tomorrow? We can have a proper chance to catch up.”

Bellamy nods enthusiastically. “Grounders?”

“I’m off at four,” Clarke says with a smile. 

“It’s a plan.” 

Bellamy returns her smile and waves as she closes the door. There had been a time in his life where he would have thought that he didn’t deserve this second chance with Clarke. But they have both grown up, and he wants to be a person that deserves to have her in his life, in whatever way that may be. 

The timing hadn’t been right before, but Bellamy will make sure that time was on their side this time around.

**Author's Note:**

> The ending of this definitely isn't me being bitter about Jason and co have been dealing with their relationship


End file.
